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Back to 911

We'd best have a positive plan of action 

Part Two

   Again, I apologise,
No Worries. Dig it, to apologize is to presuppose that there was some sort of guideline that you knew about and disregarded.
We have no guidelines for a global trauma that was yesterday. There's no blueprint for us to refer to.
As things come through the list I respond to the in the only way I can in order to maintain the tone and tenor of this list.
As I keep on making effort to remind myself: Anger is a mask for fear, pain and shame. Most of the folks I've communicated with are suffering from two of those things, the fear and pain. As an American Muslim I'm suffering from all three. But I shan't give into masking any of them with anger for that will only lower the quality of my life further. An additional negative energy to deal with. I got rice to cook. The list to look after. My own family to comfort.
When I get afraid, I hug the closest living mammal. Interspecies hugs count. But don't pet that cat bald, ok? Dang, I called my Mommy. "Watakushi wa totemo kwai desu."  which means "I'm just so afraid."  So frightened it hurt my head, made me crazy, made me loose my English.

When I get sad, I weep. Was at the store getting coffee, started weeping while grinding the beans. Ernie, the check out lady came by and we hugged, for the longest, just weeping. We didn't say anything, for there was nothing to be said. Her boss came by, a tall elderly Jordanian man and he just patted us on our shoulders sadly, wearily, and walked on by.  It's like that all over.
If you're sad...let it out. Go ahead and have the cry and keep on washing rice, loading the wet clothes into the dryer. We are in grief. We have not only lost thousands of lives on one day, we've lost our innocence as Americans. Other countries who also believed in the freedom from terrorism in America...comparatively speaking that is, are also in shock in their respective countries. Like the Nairobi Janitors in the Hilton said, "If it can happen in America, it can happen anywhere." All loss must be mourned. We are not the only people effected. This is a global trauma. We are in shock and then we'll be hit by the enormity of it all. We must be ready to move into action, and hopefully action that will be positive.
If you are in pain, in your emotional heart or in your overwhelmed brain pan, reach a friend, go to Church. Don't hide under your duvet and be rolled up like a bug unable to function. Take that step to seek out counseling. Pick up the phone. Drop me a line. We are social creatures, you just might be needing some monkey love, some other frightened monkey to groom your coat to sooth your shattered nerves.
Lastly, I want to avoid the mob, of arguments and fights and flaming on this list. I want to avoid people feeling excluded in our grief if they are in other countries. I want to validate and thank all of the people outside of America for their love, kind words and bits of philosophical musing.
Like Collin Powell said, "Get mad, Get over it."  When I listened to him on TV today I realized why I love him so. One reporter asked some question about "how can we possibly go back to being normal?" Collin Powell got miffed, " We are NOT going to go around living in fear. We are NOT going to allow this to make us not go about our lives and doing the work that needs to be done. We are NOT going to ..." and I forget what all. But I thought..."You TELL them, man!"  To allow this to make us have diminished lives is to hand an easy victory over to terrorism. To rise up and rebuild means we got Faith in our future. Faith is the opposite of Fear after all.  There was discussion of this in chat yesterday and I promised to find it and send it through the list at the request of the claymate. I will before the day is done.
Lastly, if you want to do something creative with your grief, check out my home page. There's a memorial plaque I made when I first started doing clay. It has those roses Barb and lil jo have been talking about. It's imperfect, but it was for a co worker who's mother had been slain. It meant a lot for me to make it, it meant the world to her to have it.  Take some clay and make a memorial. On the 911 page I put up there's Oscar the Funereal Cat in faux turquoise that I made for a claymate who's cat had passed on.
I mean, we are here to clay. So we can clay when we're sad. It's ok to express sorrow and loss in your art.
It takes polymer clay to a truer level of artistic expression I believe.
So there it is then, no apologies needed. It was not your intent to do mischief. I just couldn't let it go without comment because of what I've seen on other lists. Just doing my job.
So BIG HUGS A. ? Like me and Erini at the store. Big hugs, some tears and resolution to take positive action, eh? 


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