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A Loving kick in the ass Back to 911
A friend of mine, a man back east, wrote to me and said he is just so agitated, he has never been able to weep easily, his tummy is tight and he argues with his male friends who are rattling sabers and he just feels so much anger .... sound familiar? He has been keeping up with my posts to the list on the 911 page, so I'm sharing with you my reply to his letter to me this morning. A loving kick in the ass from a friend. I'm rested, my swollen hands are flexible again, chores somewhat caught up with and my GOOD NEWS for today is my newly found half sister Sherry, who was diagnosed with bladder cancer right after our father died, is FINISHED WITH CHEMO, all signs of the cancer is gone and she's down to 260lbs. If you saw her picture in my travel diary you'd know that this was a really good thing to loose this weight. So what is your GOOD NEWS for today? What acts of Heroism have you witnessed in your neighborhood What loving gestures have you born witness to that you can share here with us? For in seeing good and sharing it you'll see more good. By concentrating on the bad, that's where you're setting your default switches. You have the choice, this is where you have the POWER, by choosing what you want to recognize. See the glass half full instead of half empty. So here's my kick in the ass to Dave.


So Dave, what is your positive action? What are you going to do to peel off that mask of anger and deal with the fear and pain? If you're afraid, what is it that you're afraid of? Sudden death? You drive a car every day. If you're afraid of death generically then you got to get shrived and mean it. You got to go to your Church and have a talk with the Pastor. He might need a hand to hold himself.

I'm not afraid of dying. My children are grown and grandsons birthed. I've returned back to the community in equal measure as it has given to me, so I feel absolved of any dept of kindness I might have felt I had to pass on or return. I feel close to my God so my passing is just going home, back to the safety and peace away from this manifest realm of discomfort. I'm just not homesick yet. I do not fear my death for death is never difficult for those who pass on, but its a difficult row to hoe for those who survive and who loved the ones who have died.
The issue of dealing with grief is in the ramble: Thoughts of death and grief.  
If you're not affiliated with a church, then go talk to someone at the local crisis hotlines, they might need a hand to hold, those phone call answerers.
If you're not inclined to talk to a mental health worker, then you must take action.
This action MUST be one that aids the relief agencies, aids in rebuilding, aids in getting our people and our country back on its feet.  When the market opens on Monday, buy stock. If you needed that new frigerator, buy it. The attack was at our economic center, consumerism at this time is patriotic. Shopping is always therapeutic, women have known that for a long time. Women also know something about feeling powerless.
Action is the opposite of powerlessness. Faith is the opposite of Fear. Compassion to other people's loss and pain is in direct proportion to your emotional attachment to all you know and love. To feel empathy for those in their loss is a mirror of the love you hold in your heart. To hurt for others, even if they are strangers, only shows you have love in your heart for someone, somewhere and this is a good thing. Those who have no compassion are broken humans, too caught up in their own loops of pain and confusion to experience compassion, for they can't love, not until they are unbroken.
There is no shame in weeping. It helps with changing the chemical balance in your blood, it's a mood alerter. It's free and accessible, but in order to tap your little used weeping energy what you got to do is to admit you're sad, afraid, it hurts, and then go hug the nearest mammal and have a good cry.
Men are not socialized to express their vulnerability, to admit that they are afraid. But the President wept on camera. Big boys do cry, it's only the "little boys" who scoff at them.
Using all your emotions is to use that which we've been blessed with in this manifest form that we are walking around in.  Using all your emotions is just an exercise of being human. Voicing your fear or your pain or your sadness is to recognize it for what it is.
It is to strip off the mask of fear, pain or shame.
Do what you gotta do, get shrived, weep, turn to God in prayer, then pick yourself up, wipe your eyes and blow your nose and take some positive action. Urge all others to do the same.
Dick swinging testosterone saber rattling is just going to waste time, energy, resources and the lives of our children. Plus it don't make you feel any better, does it?
I love you and this metaphysical/philosophical kick in the ass is done in love.


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